Joe and Mary fought a lot, but their marriage was able to survive those ups and downs.
Steve and June had more than their share of disagreements and got divorced.
What’s the difference between the two couples? Joe and Mary talked their issues through during counseling sessions. Steve and June thought they could work their problems out on their own.
If you are having problems in your relationship with your spouse or partner, how do you know when you should seek professional help?
7 warning signs that you need couples counseling
- Deja vu
If the fight over an issue sounds like one you’ve waged before, it probably is. One of the clearest signs of a relationship in trouble is fights over the same issues.
- Walking on eggshells
If you’re afraid to engage in any conversation for fear of setting off your partner, you probably need counseling. Couples should be able to talk through their problems, even if a third independent ear is helping the process along.
- Giving in
You give in to your partner’s viewpoint because you don’t want to get into another argument. That’s only a short-term solution because the issue will certainly come up again.
- Separate paths
You used to enjoy doing things together, but you avoid it at all costs now. Couples often have different interests, but usually have some activities they enjoy together. If that doesn’t happen anymore, the relationship may be in trouble.
- An affair
If you are thinking of having a relationship outside of the one you are currently in, then your relationship is in jeopardy.
Your partner says he or she is sorry, but you think he or she doesn’t mean it. You also think they are likely to repeat the same behavior that upset you in the first place.
- Four Horsemen
These are not the characters from the Bible or Marvel Comics, but instead criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Noted relationship expert Dr. John Gottman characterized these four qualities that can predict the end of a relationship.
If you are seeing signs that your relationship is in trouble, seek professional help before it’s too late. TTHI Counseling Center offers counselors who can help couples navigate through the difficulties of a relationship.
Read more about couples counseling:
What you and your partner can expect in couples counseling
We discuss on our blog what to expect in couples counseling and how it can help your relationship.